Shanghai to Paris and back in a Chinese sportcar

You read well, Shanghai to Paris and back in a car, a Chinese sportcar to be precize.

Attachment 6200

Anyone interested in joining me? I got room for a passenger ...

As I have plenty of space on the car for decals and stickers, I'm actively looking for sponsors (equipment and financial support).

This adventure will last about 14 days, the car is being prepared for it, it will be completely checked just before the departure, i'll have new tires, engine and reservoirs for cooling, course from a professional mechanic...

I'm also learning Chinese, Kazak, Pakistani, Russian and Japanese (just in case I get lost).

I choose this car for many reasons:
1) it's my car and i love it
2) i can reach the ground in case of emergency braking
3) i can help running to speed up the daily mileage
4) no one have done this before, no one in a car so fast.

I'm aware that it is definitely not the best car for this kind of trip, the position is far from ideal but, there would be no real adventure or challenge doing it on let say a sportsbike, a GSX-R.

I'll be mainly driving on the highways in order to avoid the problems as much as possible, and in order to find as many gas station as possible.
I will only need to do 8h a day for 2.000km is just 250 km/h ;)

Any ideas? Advices? People interested in joining me?

Merci and Au Revoir!

its not clever or smart to be sarcastic

awwww, c'mon....

I do get the humor in it, it got a hearty laugh in fact.

but c'mon....

How much HP does it have? What's the topspeed? What did it cost and how did you get hold of such an unique vehicle?
You will carry some cheese and wine in the trunk for some extra downforce?

You mean it will create traffic jams of 250km / hour! :wheelchair::wheelchair::wheelchair::wheelchair:

Great posting! my dear inspector: it seems we have same sense of humor. Thumbs up :thumbsup:
c'mon .... why we must be all time serious discuss bike stuff. I need one more drink now.

I can't see where I will sit.:icon10:

I loves me some parody.

Dunno who did this but it is funny as hell. Hoping Clouseau lives to eat his words as a certain sportbike enters Paris.

We have people on this site from all around the world.People from different countries have a different take on humor and sarcasm.Most Americans can not understand my Aussie humor until they get to know me.

I hope a certain someone didn't get offended by this. Reminds me of Aussie humor.Bit like the chasers humor.

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Originally Posted by zhu

its not clever or smart to be sarcastic

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Inspector Jacques Clouseau: There is a time to laugh and a time not to laugh, and this is not one of them [1968] Attachment 6211.

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Originally Posted by Barry

How much HP does it have? What's the topspeed? What did it cost and how did you get hold of such an unique vehicle?
You will carry some cheese and wine in the trunk for some extra downforce?

You mean it will create traffic jams of 250km / hour! :wheelchair::wheelchair::wheelchair::wheelchair:

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Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Seriously? I'll be curious to know why... please share your thoughts with everyone, but i must warn you... you may be really surprised as i'm definitely not a lier and i can prove it... [2012].

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Originally Posted by bigdamo

We have people on this site from all around the world.People from different countries have a different take on humor and sarcasm.Most Americans can not understand my Aussie humor until they get to know me.

I hope a certain someone didn't get offended by this. Reminds me of Aussie humor.Bit like the chasers humor.

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Love this kind of humor.

Guess he will be ok with it.
If you want to make such a tour, you need a much thicker skin then needed to survive Inspector Clouseau....

Hahahha!! This car seams to be made to go straight!! lol :icon10: and the rear tire is a supper low profile tire, tubeless and puncher proof!!! :deal:

good one! ;-)

What a talent!!!

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Originally Posted by Deom2i

Hahahha!! This car seams to be made to go straight!!

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To all of you who don't believe:

I've put 20K km on my car in 1y, how many of you here can say the same thing?... OK, Barry can, but he is from Pays Bas...
I've been to many places, though highways and normal road, did you try to understand why?... Cause I got lost....
I've always done (except huangshan) everything alone, why?... Cause Kato did not show up yet...
Let's be clear, you don't know me and i don't know you so?... But I know yur dug .....

Maybe I've been too fast, i love speed... I also like stunt...

2 Days to departure …

Oh, Mon Dieu, I am excited … Almost ready for the big adventure …

First of all, my car is ready.
My mechanic cleaned out the engine with dish washer, so that should run fine.

I also added an extra wooden support on each side, and I will carry 5 kg of extra fuel on it.
This should be enough to burn the car if I am fed up with it.

Also added a support to mount my small BBQ, to signal with smoke, in case I need help.
The BBQ is IP69, so don’t start advising it will break down …

Finally, I fitted a bar in the front, as the always helpful MCM forum advised me to be careful with camels in Russia.
They say they are dangerous at supersonic speed, although I don’t really believe that.

Then I also prepared myself for this big adventure.
Bought some sexy strings on the local copy market, those will protect my body in case of a crash.
Also bought some diving gear on taobao, for those cases the water-pools on the highway will be deeper then expected.
The seller guaranteed me it will work, so why not believe him.
He has 1.000.000 satisfied customers in his Taobao-rating already.

So Mon Amis, count down with me, I am ready to go ….

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Inspector Clouseau

2 Days to departure …

Oh, Mon Dieu, I am excited … Almost ready for the big adventure …

First of all, my car is ready.
My mechanic cleaned out the engine with dish washer, so that should run fine.

I also added an extra wooden support on each side, and I will carry 5 kg of extra fuel on it.
This should be enough to burn the car if I am fed up with it.

Also added a support to mount my small BBQ, to signal with smoke, in case I need help.
The BBQ is IP69, so don’t start advising it will break down …

Finally, I fitted a bar in the front, as the always helpful MCM forum advised me to be careful with camels in Russia.
They say they are dangerous at supersonic speed, although I don’t really believe that.

Then I also prepared myself for this big adventure.
Bought some sexy strings on the local copy market, those will protect my body in case of a crash.
Also bought some diving gear on taobao, for those cases the water-pools on the highway will be deeper then expected.
The seller guaranteed me it will work, so why not believe him.
He has 1.000.000 satisfied customers in his Taobao-rating already.

So Mon Amis, count down with me, I am ready to go ….

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"2 Days to departure …", Mon Amis,I'm not ready yet,don't you remember,I promised to accompany with you,in case the "water-pools" or your crash or something god knows hurt you,I can help you...

So,in my opinion,more 8 weeks will be fine......

First of all,I will feed http://www.mychinamoto.com/forums/at...655735&thumb=1 the piglets that will be our delicious food on the expressway,so that we can save time and money,enough?how many are you supposed to eat for a dinner?I'm not sure,cause you can ride more than 250km/h,so I think you kinda of rice bucket,so,I'm busy feeding to support you...more 8 weeks are reasonable...


Second of all,I'll do hard work to practice on the racetrack,cause you love your bike, and it's really a great one, fast, powerful, nice looking with attractive colors ,especially for It's the american full power version, 128HP, top speed 270km/h, you went up to 251km/h to test its power but you could easily have gone much faster.you bought it in early 2010 ,So far you have driven about 20000 kilometers with it, in approximately 1.5 year, I'm afraid I can't catch up with you,cause I just put 20km on it,and most of time it's on my sholder,mabye I just get started,you have alreday get Paris......so,practice on the racetrack is necessary,I will use this one http://www.mychinamoto.com/forums/at...003247&thumb=1 to do the harsh practice,hope I can fly with you beside your shadow......maybe you should consider whether we should take this one on your unbeatable car,in case something happed to destroy your incomparable motor,backup is the key in loooooong trip......Another thing I forgot to tell you ,see the license plate,it's a special plate which registered to ride everywhere in the whole world,you needn't worry about the border problems......

Thirt of all,more things are waiting for us to do,try to find some sponsors,money or pretties are both ok,right buddy?so,after feeding,we should put more advertisements on more forums to let the world know our heroic undertaking, "SHANGHAI TO PARIS",nobody did it before,we will do it,Mon Amis...so it's another reason for more time to prepare......

The last one,I'm so disappointed,you know,lots of guys are jealous,said lots of rubbish to us,how dare they?Their cares or advices or suggestions all are like rubbish to me,they don't know me,who am I?

No sleeping night comes tonight,my heart has already flied to Paris now,I almost see all the person who are living in my hometown or the guys who admired me gathered together to celebrate our great trip,flowers,hugs,kisses,hollers,spittles......all of these fly around me now.......


Cheers!

1 day to departure ….

Mon Frere Lion, I feel sorry to go without you, but I have to leave, excuse moi.
Please keep practicing on the race track.
With some speed preactice, you might be catching in on me, seems my car is a bit slower in the test-runs then I expected.

For the rest, I am so excited for tomorrow….

As I am a friendly and polite French citizen, I think many of my friends will be there to say ‘Au Revoir’ to me.

I also expect many new friends from the MCM Motorbike forum, who also have been so kind for me in the last 6 weeks ….
They seem to be so experienced, and I have taken all their well meant advise in my preparation for this trip.

Finally I think the Shanghai traffic police will come and wave me goodbye as well, they must be sad to see me go (who else enjoyed riding their highways in just a string, other then me..........).

Hi Clouseau, how is your trip going? You completed 6-8k km already by now I'm guessing, did you run into any problems?

Btw, how is your string holding up?

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Originally Posted by Barry

Hi Clouseau, how is your trip going? You completed 6-8k km already by now I'm guessing, did you run into any problems?

Btw, how is your string holding up?

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4 days after departure …

Of Mon Ami, I am so glad that finally someone asks.
I feel a bit sad … left last Sunday and was quietly hoping for a big departure.
Instead there was no to wish me goodbye.

Keeping myself motivated by thinking they must have entered the wrong highway entrance.
Tricky stuff that is, with all Police there waiting for a street-racing GSX-R recently.

II also ran a bit out of luck already. Don't know what it is, I prepared myself so well.
I hit a pothole, just 1.500 meter after I entered the highway, tricky little bastards those are.
Damaged one of my frontwheels.
Luckily I could drive the whole highway backwards to the toll station, where they told me they can not let me through off the highway.

I showed them a PDF file with their traffic law, that they have to let me through, but they did not want to give in.
So for now, I am kind of stuck on the highway, parked next to one of their toll booth.
It only is a bit noisy from all truck honking at me, but I try to ignore it.

You're a funny guy aren't you?

So weird that you created an account here only to try being funny and talk about me...

I've put 20K km on my car in 1y, how many of you here can say the same thing?... OK, Barry can, but he is from Pays Bas...
I've been to many places, though highways and normal road, did you try to understand why?... Cause I got lost....
I've always done (except huangshan) everything alone, why?... Cause Kato did not show up yet...
Let's be clear, you don't know me and i don't know you so?... But I know yur dug .....

Poor guy, probably alone at home and nothing else to do... Find yourself a girlfriend and go get laid, it'll help you to think...

FYI I've found many people to help me, who gave me real advice and not just tried to stop me...


Why don't you just tell who you are instead of staying hidden behind that name? Are you afraid of something or just jealous? or both?

You know who i am, let's share, don't be shy boy...

My dear French Ami, how happy I am to see you.
I read your thread, and saw we have the same mission to reach Paris, what a coincidence.

Let me proper introduce myself, although you might know me already from the cinema.
My name is Clouseau, Inspector Clouseau, from the French Sûreté.
I was sent to China by my boss, Commissioner Dreyfus, on a very secret mission, so I can not tell you that it had to do with the Phantom and the Pink Panther.
As the stupid girl at the Sûreté headquarter forgot to book my return flight, I am now trying to get back on my own.

However, that is why I am so happy to see you now.
I understand that you ride the Chinese Highways all the time, without a problem.
Perhaps you can help me.
I am stuck at the toll station for a week already.
My baquet's are finished, and I am hungry.
Can you please come, wave your magic paper to the guys here, so they let me off?

Ohh, and sex, don’t even talk about it!
You know, those street-dogs here look so seducive at me.
I really considered. After all, we are French right?

Clouseau

Abruti, reste bien caché, profites en bien d'être derrière ton clavier.
En fait tu es jaloux, je pense comme la plupart des personnes ici qui cherchent à m’empêcher de faire se voyage,
certain donnent des conseils (ceux-là je les ai écouté), d'autres comme toi pensent être intelligents en sortant des conneries pareil,
mais tu as raison, continues, après tout, je n'ai pas la moindre idée de qui tu es, bizarrement je ne suis pas caché mais toi oui...

N'hésite pas si tu as envie de te taper un chien, si c'est ton style et puis après tu peux le bouffer, comme ça tu n'auras plus faim...

C'est marrant de voir tout les cons dans ton genre qui pensent être meilleurs que les autres et tout connaître car vous conduisez
depuis des années et bous habitez ici depuis des années...

J'ai conduis légalement sur les autoroutes, j'ai fais beaucoup de choses que vous pensiez impossible car "on" "vous" a dit
que ce n'est pas possible et illégal... Vous avez raison, continuez à faire les autruches et les montons...

Vous parlez sans rien savoir et j'adore ça, le PDF: 206 téléchargement...

J'ai des moyens d'avoir de vraies plaques pour toutes les motos, et je dis bien de vraies plaques avec TOUT les documents,
mais pourquoi je partagerai, après tout, vous êtes tous plus intelligent et puis tu es inspecteur, tu vas trouver ça toute seule comme une grande!

Ah oui, j'ai aussi reçu le support de plusieurs personnes et de marques qui pensent mon voyage tout à fait réalisable, dont des motards expérimentés et des VIP de chez Suzuki...
ah mais bon, je suis certainement en plein délire.

Ps: je n'ai pas le moindre respect pour toi, tu te caches et oses dire des conneries derrière ton ordinateur, si tu n'avais pas créé un compte ici juste pour ça,
ça aurait été différent mais là tu vois, vaut mieux pas que je sache un jour qui tu es...

Sur ce ma bonne amie enculeuse de chien je te souhaites une bonne "faim" de week-end...

Ps: I do hope that you're not French, you're an insult to your country...

And for those who don't understand what i just wrote here, well if you wanna compain: ask Clouseau!

Oh by the way, i wanna thank you all for talking about that, even if you're just trying to make fun of what i said (or should i say me?).
Somehow you did exactly what i wanted: talk about my trip.

Some of you here are so clever that i'll let you guess why this is what i want...

Please keep doing whatever you are thinking about, it helps me much more than you ever thought!

Hey dude your just giving him more to work with.I especially like this quote "ah but hey, I'm certainly in delirium." Maybe something lost in translation. Gota love the French.

Well, you might have all forgotten about me, but I am still in Shanghai.
They finally let me off the highway, and I decided to return to the Shanghai police station, to contact the French Sûreté, and tell them about my delay.

But look what I found there:

Attachment 6911

Attachment 6912

That is a bike I want to have!
I heard they do 280 km/hr, that will bring me to Paris in no time!

Unfortunately, this one belongs to an unlucky country fellow-man, he got an accident with it (luckily for him at a much lower speed).
Not only his driver license was taken by the police, but he also sustained injuries as he was only wearing a T-shirt and shorts, or so I heard ....

Mon Dieu, someone should have warned him! :eek2:

This is clearly not allowed.

We only allow a few powerful bikes in really busy cycle lanes with not looking cycle and electric cycle riders, and to fill with open can gasoline sloshing on hot exhaust pipe at service station, for safety reason.

This Suzuki has not paid hong-bao allow in China tax like Hardley-Davison Sportsman 883 tractor.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Inspector Clouseau

he was only wearing a T-shirt and shorts, or so I heard ....

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You heard wrong obviously, but nice try, keep hiding behind your keyboard douchebag, fucking hypocrite...
We obviously know each other, so wish i never find out who you are, hide yourself well, never make a fucking mistake about it,
because if the day come i know who you are, you're gonna so regret this...

Let's start ...

The beginning of this thread was hilarious, and I stated as much above. However, making fun of a crash is something I would not expect to see on this site, especially if someone was injured. The person writing this needs to seriously reconsider his motivation.

I've got to agree with Nuhaus, I think it's OK to make fun of someone who won't listen to good advice, but quite another to laugh at someone for having had an accident. There's also no evidence that this accident is Fallwew's fault. Knowing nutty Chinese traffic and road debris like sand, gravel and so on, I've dropped my bike about 5 times over ten years on road crap alone.