Literal translations......

-Have you come home? As I'm walking in through the door. No it's not me its my twin, a hologram etc.
-Have you eaten yet? As I'm cooking, walking into/out of a restaurant/actually eating.
-Are you going out? As I'm going out/coming home.
-It's raining! When I can see it's raining.

I mean is it really worth wasting your time dignifying a response?