Limes ???

Ok Culcune , I bought Limes and Rubbers now ....Waiting still .....

Is your imagination running wild or did you actualy figure out my plot ???
Sometimes your pretty bright , so maybe you can figure this out without any more clues to the post ???

Here's a hint :
the limes are green and large sized , and the Condoms are Gigantic size to fit me ...And I won't need lube if I am drunk enough to use either ???

Get my point yet ??? An Elephantansnortin never forgets ..

Believe it or not I am sober and not stoned either . Truth ..

Kelly out

I was planning a ride into the 3rd world country today, but it's freaking raining. It's still early, and my wife needs cigarettes, and someone is in dire need of "hookers" :mwink: and tequila. Do you like flavored tequila--there is a really tasty almond tequila that drinks like a liquer, or do you just want the nasty stuff?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by culcune

I was planning a ride into the 3rd world country today, but it's freaking raining. It's still early, and my wife needs cigarettes, and someone is in dire need of "hookers" :mwink: and tequila. Do you like flavored tequila--there is a really tasty almond tequila that drinks like a liquer, or do you just want the nasty stuff?

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---------------

Neither Culcune ,
I don't drink , nor do I screw nasty woman Simon . This was all in fun , MINE !!!!! :lol8:
I am just trying to make you more responcible is all . You are my SON you know ??? Your Mom didn't tell ya ??? Damn her ...
My point is , you TOLD me around X-Mas you were sending something to me from Mexico for a late X-Mas present ? Here I sit wating on Hookers and Tequilla ??? What is this , February now ???
When I sent you that beautiful Colt 1861 Revolver for free even paid shipping to you , with custom English Walnut grips and unfired no less , I did exactly what I said , did I not ???
I hold people to a very high standard , MINE . When someone , especialy a friend like you are to me that is , I actually expect your going to do what say ??? Silly me , LOL !!! :lol8:
I am aware things can get hectic in life , I know because mine is hectic . I still found time to do you up well with that gun , did I not ??? It is all about priorities Culcune , my friends being very high on mine . But that's just me . :icon10: Do you think I had time , money , or was very willing to send you a $300 plus dollar gun that you wanted to get into BP shooting sports with if I am slacker ???? No , I did all that because your my friend , right . Did I have time or money to do it ? No , not really, but I made time because your a friend and I wanted you to have something very cool and nice .
When I asked you if you shot the thing yet , you said no , no time , but I am taking it to LA for X-Mas and will shoot it for sure . You didn't do that either , so your track record with me is getting stressed .
Same thing with Crazy Carl with turning him onto the San Fransisco beens . I did that with phone numbers , e-mail addresses, info so he could be turned onto good beens at a good price because I consider him my friend Simon .
And by golly he did exactly what he said he was going to , and he thanked me and appreciated my efforts. Very cool and very ADULT like ...
I don't do shit for friends wanting something in return Simon , but I do expect them to do what they say they are going to do . Once agian probably my bad here , because I actually thought you would do all you said you would do , with the gun , the X-mas gift I never got , etc, etc ....
I certainly aint pissed or anything , just disapointed you don't hold me very high on your friend priority list . Proof is in the Pudding and my pudding looks kinda lumpy like Tapiocca today ...
Here's the deal, if I have a BROTHER BIKER in need , I will do anything for him , even take a bullet if need be . I can say that is earned from my Brothers and how they treat me and respect me though .
I think you and I have a different ethical standard of freindships is all here .
This may hurt a little when I tell you this , but if JIM was broke down on the side of the rode on his bike , I would stop to help him .
You , not so sure Simon ? Kinda bums me out I feel like that today though ?
Freindship is free , but it comes at price if you don't participate , and the price is LOSS .

Cheers, Kelly

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

Same thing with Crazy Carl with turning him onto the San Fransisco beens . I did that with phone numbers , e-mail addresses, info so he could be turned onto good beens at a good price because I consider him my friend Simon .

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Well hold on just a second! I didn't get no free beans er' nuffin!

Now that don't seem hardly fair. Shit, where's mah comeuppance!!! That'll be beans AND guns next time SNorton. Make mine a Webley please! :deal:

:icon10:
CC

OK, OK...got to Mexico today, and one hooker named "Lupita" and 2 burachos (you'll see what I mean--burachos (sp?) are the Mexican term for drunkards )getting sent to Washington. Yes, really!!! I have a line on some other hookers, ones that like BIG guns, specifically 7.62 x 39 long...:eekers:

(you do need to post photos of you and your hooker, though), and your two burachos will make good coffee-drinking companions, and might even slow Snortin' down just a bit :mwink:)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by CrazyCarl

Well hold on just a second! I didn't get no free beans er' nuffin!

Now that don't seem hardly fair. Shit, where's mah comeuppance!!! That'll be beans AND guns next time SNorton. Make mine a Webley please! :deal:

:icon10:
CC

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-------------------

Crazy Carl ha ha ha ,
I have to apologize for no gun just yet for you , I have known Simon a good long time now before you ever entered my life , sorry , ( for me ) ??? If you knew just how prescious and sacred my Coffee bean supplier is to me you'd actually be kissing my feet now instead of demanding guns and ammo too alonmg with my bean supplier , LOL !!! :lol8:
You'z got to understans that turning you onto "MY" beans is like giving you a pile of my Crack Cocaine , so it cuts into my buzz and supply in the world if you know what I mean ...:thumbsup: Trust me when I tell you your special like Culcune is to me . Special Olympics is more like what Simon is right now though to me ??? And you want a Webley ? God Dammit , I knew you had good taste but I did not know you had that good of taste ??? I don't owne any Webleys but darn it all it is one of my favorit-est Brittish guns there is on my wants list . Some would call them the ugly duckling , but I consider them beautiful and genious , like me . I really like the one model that recoils back and cocks itself for each shot there-after and gas check seals the chamber when fireing also , which is BRILLIANT !!!! If I ever run accross a couple , I promise you'll get one . And I will actualy send it to you for free !!!! LOL !!

Snortin , wantin Webley mother F-er today out

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

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You'z got to understans that turning you onto "MY" beans is like giving you a pile of my Crack Cocaine

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See, I knew there was something besides espresso and guns to your late nights

Simon with his burachos :goodtime: and Lupita :asshat: checking out!

Wow, ain't that something :icon10: I'm confused, and warm and fuzzy inside all at the same time :thumbsup:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Jim

Wow, ain't that something :icon10: I'm confused, and warm and fuzzy inside all at the same time :thumbsup:

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It's a Snortin' thing--you wouldn't understand!!
:thumbsup:

Alright guys, don't go getting all "hands across the world" on me n' shit. :lol8:

:goodtime:
CC

The package is wrapped--just need to get to the post-office or the UPS store or somewhere similar. The next hooker is Friday--yes, this Friday, and she will be for a looong gun!!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by culcune

The package is wrapped--just need to get to the post-office or the UPS store or somewhere similar. The next hooker is Friday--yes, this Friday, and she will be for a looong gun!!

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----------------

Simon man , I would try to understand that last piece of dribble you wrote , but I am truelly " Lost in translation " . Hey, isn't that a Movie Title ???

If I were to guess what kind of Hooker it is , I would have to say she is from Stolen American Leather and made-fabricated in Mexico with scroll work on her breasts ???? I bet I am right on the money aint I ???

Snortin , " eagerlly awaiting enlightenment " Norton :thumbsup:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

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If I were to guess what kind of Hooker it is , I would have to say she is from Stolen American Leather and made-fabricated in Mexico with scroll work on her breasts ???? I bet I am right on the money aint I ???

Snortin , " eagerlly awaiting enlightenment " Norton :thumbsup:

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Snortin, I wouldn't say stolen American leather, but rather decrepit, lazy, shriveled, hard to eat steak, Mexican beef, leather.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by culcune

Snortin, I wouldn't say stolen American leather, but rather decrepit, lazy, shriveled, hard to eat steak, Mexican beef, leather.

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Culcune-a-fish ,

Good thing I can't spell Burachos then ?

Were you inferring Mexicans are lazy ???? How dare you say that when they are so motivated to come over here to America for the day and go to our schools for free , and get free Medical , dental , and vision ??? Oh and lets not forget the DMV that now gives out liscences to Illegal ALLIENS . Now lets talk Social Security too now , it is just a jouyous topic ..Shall we go into free college education and scholorships too ? I love paying my own way for school and sitting next to such motivated people . Makes me smile Simon . Can you see my grin now ???
I don't blame them , but I do blame there COWS , damn cows anyway .
I need more Crack Cocaine to cope with all this . I better go ask Pablo and his Cow for some more .

Cheerios , boob boo booo , MOOOOO , MMMOOOOOOO , Mooo
Snortin out

Wait what, you have people from the country south of you coming and abusing your free health care??? (I didn't know you had free health care?), however I do know that the country north of you has that problem too.

Well Jim, some health care is better than none! :deal:

CC

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Jim

Wait what, you have people from the country south of you coming and abusing your free health care??? (I didn't know you had free health care?), however I do know that the country north of you has that problem too.

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Are you sure you want to go here Jim ???
We don't have free health care here , unless your a welfare Momma or illegal allien . Even you Jim could come here to have your baby ( Guninness Book of Records ) in one of our fine Hospitals and it would be a USA citizen on the spot and you could then for sure get your Citizenship too after that .
It's a great system , no wonder the economy is in the pisser . Its bad enough our Governement embezzles our money but allowing free alien care is BS ....
Build a wall today !!!!! And put me on Wall Guard Duty for a job too while were at it . Paid marksmanship lessons there , ha ha ha ha .

Snortin

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

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Build a wall today !!!!! And put me on Wall Guard Duty for a job too while were at it . Paid marksmanship lessons there , ha ha ha ha .

Snortin

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The northern wall or southern wall :naughty::lol8:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by culcune

The northern wall or southern wall :naughty::lol8:

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Simon ,
maybe a giant circle wall , north south east west and make it circular like a Giant Toilet Bowl and put me in the middel with a .50 Caliber Machine Gun .
It would look like a Giant Toilet with big fat turd in the middle ...:thumbsup:
Kinda smells like one too . :lol8:

Snortin , need a gas mask , Norton

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

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Simon ,
maybe a giant circle wall , north south east west and make it circular like a Giant Toilet Bowl and put me in the middel with a .50 Caliber Machine Gun .
It would look like a Giant Toilet with big fat turd in the middle ...:thumbsup:
Kinda smells like one too . :lol8:

Snortin , need a gas mask , Norton

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Wow, went from hookers and burrachos, to warm and fuzzy, to health insurance, to giant toilets with .50 machine guns!!:eekers:

I don't have to read the newspaper anymore for international affairs, just the "take it outside" section of mychinamoto for all my news and entertainment.:thumbsup:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by culcune

Wow, went from hookers and burrachos, to warm and fuzzy, to health insurance, to giant toilets with .50 machine guns!!:eekers:

I don't have to read the newspaper anymore for international affairs, just the "take it outside" section of mychinamoto for all my news and entertainment.:thumbsup:

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Damn straight !!!! I will only wrtie in the Chaos Column of the Newspapers anyway , and here it sits on My China Moto ..

Snortin Norton , Hostile Editor and self appointed Chief ass-hole .
Where's my damn Coffee and Crack anyway !!!!

Kelly out

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

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Are you sure you want to go here Jim ???

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Go where? I wasn't trying to argue, I was just saying, that our "free" health care (which has premiums, like health insurance), is used by Americans, Michael Moore had someone come up and ab(use) our health care, and lie to our border guards on camera.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Jim

Michael Moore had someone come up and ab(use) our health care, and lie to our border guards on camera.

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Michael Moore is known for his abuse---of those idiots (me included) who have had the horror of sitting through one of his "movies" :eekers::eek2::snooze:

But the (toilet) bowling for Columbus movie did influence me to buy some guns:thumbsup: ha ha ha :gun_bandana::gun_bandana::gun_bandana:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

Snortin Norton , Hostile Editor and self appointed Chief ass-hole .
Where's my damn ....Crack anyway !!!!

Kelly out

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I personally like the new style of jeans that hot chicks are wearing that hang so low you get to see come crack

:asshat:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by culcune

I personally like the new style of jeans that hot chicks are wearing that hang so low you get to see come crack

:asshat:

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-----------------------------------

Ironically enough Simon , yesterday at work I had to install and replace three toilets for my Fiance's Boss at his office and house .
He was standing behind watching me work , and I did not know it till he scared the crap out of me , telling me I looked like the Teenie-Bopper Chicks that run around with there pants nearly off their asses . I said " gee thanks , does this make you a Crack Addict , now go away " .................
Plumbers Crack , the worst drug !!!!

Jim , I am disappointed , I thought you were throwing stones at the USA again and we could argue some more like the good old days , LOL , just kidding . After reading your story about the Micheal Moore thing , I am shocked that anyone would actaully use your system at all that isn't from
there ??? I would said WHY ????

Cuclune , I have my shot glasses out and on the table waiting for the Burachos ? They are in order by ounces , mine being a 40 oz. shot glass , there's 2 oz. .................Seams fare to me ????

Dater Lays , Snortin out

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Snortin Norton

-----------------------------------

Ironically enough Simon , yesterday at work I had to install and replace three toilets for my Fiance's Boss at his office and house .
He was standing behind watching me work , and I did not know it till he scared the crap out of me , telling me I looked like the Teenie-Bopper Chicks that run around with there pants nearly off their asses . I said " gee thanks , does this make you a Crack Addict , now go away " .................
Plumbers Crack , the worst drug !!!!

---

That's just wrong, but he does pay you, correct? Maybe you can get a rai$e by wearing half-shirts, and skimpy shorts? Women can take advantage of hetero men who are soon parted of their money, why can't straight men take advantage of gay men?

[/Quote]
Cuclune , I have my shot glasses out and on the table waiting for the Burachos ? They are in order by ounces , mine being a 40 oz. shot glass , there's 2 oz. .................Seams fare to me ????
[/QUOTE]
I think this booze will mix well with your coffee, and calm you down!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by culcune

That's just wrong, but he does pay you, correct? Maybe you can get a rai$e by wearing half-shirts, and skimpy shorts? Women can take advantage of hetero men who are soon parted of their money, why can't straight men take advantage of gay men?

---

Cuclune , I have my shot glasses out and on the table waiting for the Burachos ? They are in order by ounces , mine being a 40 oz. shot glass , there's 2 oz. .................Seams fare to me ????
[/QUOTE]
I think this booze will mix well with your coffee, and calm you down![/QUOTE]
-------------------

Calm down !!!! ?????? ARE YOU FREEKIN KIDDING ME , I AM CALM DAMMIT :lol8:

If you seen this guys wife , there would be no wonder I may look attractive to him ....I think her mustache is bigger than mine ????? I am sure her penis is too ???? I would ask her myself if he's gay but I think she might Bitch slapp me with her 9mm ... :thumbsup:
That's all 9mm's are good for anyway Simon ... Real men shoot .45's , that leaves you out you know ...:lol8:

Oh and by the way , I get hyper when I don't drink coffee man , its ugly !!!!
I am a reverse addict .

Dater Freeto-Lays , and little mexican boobies for everyone on Culcunes tab might I add .

Kelly out

:eek2:

:lol8::lol8::lol8:

Simon ,
I am off today, self appointed day off might I add . It's good to be King !!! :icon10:
I will be home all day doing chores if the UPS driver comes and delivers the Borachos and Nachos today ??? Muther Suckers better bring coffee beans or I am cappin thier asses with my Air Soft Shotgun ..I have a $150 RWS Red Dot scope on it , I can hit a cat at 30 feet no problems , so the Burachos are gonners if they don't bring me beans when they come to drink ( alone ) .
And that cheap Hooker your sending had better have already showered too !!!! And she better have small breasts too or I am sending you a box of cat poop for sure .

Snortin , still patiently waiting Norton

Kelly, I sent the package US Postal service, and the guy didn't make me fill out any label, but did take my money (it was a privately owned store that does US Mail on the side). The guy better not have taken Kelly's package for his own use--I will personally drive up to Washington to pick up your cat-killing air rifle, just to leave grudge welts on the guy, and yell something like "don't mess with K----- ------"(your name) just to throw off the Keystone cops of Yuma. They can catch molestors (not on their own), but not murderers or air-rifle attackers, so you would be ok